


I'm sorry if I fell in love tonight

by RavenAurelieChoiseau



Category: Twenty One Pilots, joshler - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Eventual Smut, Feelings Realization, First Dates, First Kiss, First Love, Fluff, M/M, Musicians, Sweet, dallon weekes mentioned - Freeform, dont want to give it away in the tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-04-15 00:43:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14148198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenAurelieChoiseau/pseuds/RavenAurelieChoiseau
Summary: Josh and Tyler are seniors. They don't attend the same school, however. Their love blossoms at music school.Josh closed his eyes and let out a breath, feeling the bass of Tyler's heartbeat thrumming through the air; he drew a breath and tasted it, sighing as it danced over his tongue, a kiss from somewhere the light still lived, beyond the shadow of his timid heart... One more breath. Pineapple and promise began to waltz boldly through his soul. It was intoxicating.- prompt from my dear friend Ambear





	1. The Uncommon Thread

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, inspiration struck at the weirdest moment. Enjoy.

Tyler gathers his things, shoving his piano books crookedly into the backpack. Now it won’t zip up.  _Crap!_

He’s late. “Why am I always late?!” he asks himself, not without a note of introspection. He sighs. Tyler’s tired.

He looks up at the clock in the practice room anxiously and bites down on his lip.

“Shit, coach is going to have my ass.” He struggles with the rucksack some more, but it’s worse now. He’s put an enormous crease into one of the covers.

“Come on…” he whines as his hands fumble. 

 “Ouch.” Great. He’s given himself a paper cut. Tyler puts the fingertip to his lips.

“Why won’t this stupid book fit?! Who makes these things so gigantic?!” his brain begs.

Tyler shoves and moves stuff around and somehow _finally_ manages to put the last corner in under the seam, closing the stupid backpack as he hooks it into his arm.

He’s begun to sweat. Tyler get anxious very easily. It’s one issue he’s had for a while now. He can still remember the panic attack he had last week. For some reason he had got it into his head that he was an awful basketball player and would never make the NBA. His parents had tried to reassure him, but he could barely get out of bed. This resulted in his brother Zack sitting with him for hours until it passed.

Tyler’s dressed in his school uniform sweats, his bright red basketball shoes hung over his shoulder. If he runs, he’ll only be a few minutes late to practice. He’ll still get chewed out, but at least he’ll show up "nearly" on time.

The music school is just around the corner from the gym. “7 minutes I’m there,” he calculates.

Despite being home-schooled most of his life, Tyler’s parents decided he did need to socialize with others, (well, others that weren’t his family). Since the anxiety had been getting worse since puberty, the Josephs sent him to the Christian academy in Columbus. Their reasoning was that he needed to be around kids his age, but in a controlled environment. (The Josephs are very religious, which for a multitude of reasons, worries Tyler. Not least of which is the fact that Tyler Joseph has known he was gay since about…oh, birth). 

Tyler by nature is very shy. He doesn’t make friends easily, often feeling awkward around others. He’s often quiet and pensive, and until he grew into his body, was also rather clumsy. Then he discovered he was good at shooting hoops. This became his anchor. 

He does have one friend. His name is Dallon. Dallon’s a teammate from the basketball team, and they couldn’t be more different. Dallon’s even taller than Josh, and handsome. He’s extremely funny and outgoing. Sometimes it’s unclear to Tyler why Dallon hangs out with him at school, since he’s so popular and Tyler…just isn’t.

Dallon’s actually Mormon, but attends the school on a scholarship. He’s another NBA “star” in the making. Tyler likes his friend a lot, though he doesn’t have much time to spend with him outside of academics. With practice and music they are both extremely occupied. Dallon also sings and plays some instruments, though he’s been more concentrated on the bass of late.

Tyler isn’t thinking about Dallon as he races down the poorly-lit hallway, though. Out of nowhere his attention is drawn to the sound of intense drumming. It’s coming from one of the smaller practice rooms. He deliberates whether he can spare a second to peer in, because whoever this is, he or she is really good. He slows to a fast walk.

“Oh, screw it,” he breathes.

Tyler backtracks and presses his face against the glass. There’s a guy with his back turned to the door, drumming in bare feet. It’s not a full kit, but he’s making it sound absolutely amazing. Tyler is taken aback at how skilled he is. He can’t really tell from this angle, but he looks about his age, maybe slightly older. He’s more robust compared to Tyler’s own lanky body, filling out the Green day t-shirt he’s donning rather impressively. Tyler’s gaze can’t help but be drawn to an oblong sweat stain in the middle of the boy’s shirt that reveals an extremely well-defined back under that flimsy, soaked cotton. Something stirs in Ty, that has been pretty much lain dormant.

“It’s no wonder he’s sweaty,” the singer tries to justify to himself. “It gets so hot in these tiny rooms, and playing drums isn’t exactly like sitting calmly at the piano playing Debussy.” (That stupid book doesn’t fit anywhere!) Tyler tell himself what he has to in order to not feel whatever is happening in his pants.

Needless to say, the pianist is intrigued. Except for Dallon, he’s never really talked to the boys at his school. And Dallon Weekes is just so much cooler and more confident than him, it never even entered his mind to have an attraction towards him.

Instead, Tyler's already drawn to the drummer, and he’s only seen this guy from the back. Huh. _Wow, I must be desperate._

The boy stops drumming, grabs a bottle from beneath his stool, and takes a sip. Tyler just observes his movements, the way the muscles of his arms tense and relax. Everything about it is very fluid.

The stranger reaches into his pocket and takes out his phone, unlocking the screen. Something compels Ty to want to talk to him, and now seems like the perfect moment. He doesn’t want to interrupt him, but he’d like to at least compliment him on his mad skills. This is so unlike Tyler, but it’s like he’s possessed. Before he can stop himself, his knuckles reach up and rap on the door.

The guy doesn’t turn around. Maybe he has ear plugs in, Tyler can see something like a wire peeking from underneath his beanie. He slowly opens the door while knocking on it again.

“Excuse me, sorry to bother you.”

The drummer still doesn’t look up. Tyler takes another step and gently touches his shoulder. The boy flinches, turning to face the intruder. A beautiful pair of russet saucers look up at him.

“Shoot, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Dark, almond-shaped eyes fixate on Tyler’s cherry lips. 

 “Who is this?” the boy asks himself.

Tyler repeats, “Sorry I scared you. I’m Tyler.” As he puts out his hand, Tyler notices the rest of his features. He is now fully aware of how good-looking the guy is.  _Oh. Okay. You’re kinda hot._

Tyler might be blushing a little. The drummer notices the rose in his cheeks, but doesn’t immediately attribute it to a possible intense and visceral physical attraction.  Still, he’s not unaware of the superlative cuteness of this unknown person standing in front of him.                                            

Little dark curls peek out from under the boy’s hat, and Tyler resists the urge to reach out and touch them. He doesn’t because that would be “really weird.” Instead, he shakes his hand. It’s really warm from playing, almost damp, and feels slightly rough against his smooth skin. The boy lifts his finger in a “one second” motion, and writes something into his phone. He turns it to show Tyler.

 **Hi Tyler. Nice to meet you. I’m Josh. I’m sorry I didn’t answer you, but I didn’t hear you come in. Um, I’m deaf.** He points to his ears and smiles awkwardly.

 _Jeez, Tyler. Nice going, you ass._  Now he sees it. Josh playing barefoot, the hearing aids.  _I’m such an idiot._

Tyler types into his phone, hands trembling. Here comes the anxiety again.

“I’m so sorry, Josh. So, so sorry. I feel so stupid. I really hope I didn’t startle you too much. Um, can you lip read or should I write?”

Josh nods and points to his lips. He mouths OKAY and gives a thumbs up. He turns his hearing aids back on, lifting the beanie. Tyler notices his gauges. This guy is so magnificently different from all the other boys at his school. From any other boy he has ever met, to be truthful.

“Cool.” Tyler says, being sure to keep his speech regular. He has a cousin who is deaf, and though he can’t sign, he has learned how to communicate.   
“I stepped inside because I wanted to tell you how awesome you were playing. You’re amazing, dude!”

Josh reveals a row of white teeth, and reddens slightly, looking down at his feet in embarrassment.

Tyler’s knees buckle unexpectedly. Josh’s eyes just crinkle in the corners in the most adorable way, and he has the most beautiful smile Tyler’s ever seen. The way his tongue catches on his lower teeth.

“Jesus, that tongue.” Tyler can’t quiet his urges to save his life. He shifts uncomfortably from one foot to the other.  _Okay, scratch that. You are super hot and I now I’m really turned on all of a sudden._

Josh types : **Thanks, man. I appreciate it! What do you play? I’m new here so this is really only my second day.**

Tyler grins. “Oh wow. In fact I haven’t seen you before. I play piano, uke, bass. And I sing a little.”

Josh nods.  **I also see you play sports. Sweet kicks. Basketball? Just guessing cuz you’re, um, tall.** _And hot._

Josh checks himself. Did he just think that 5 minutes after meeting him?

The singer smiles shyly. “Guilty. Basketball team.” And then he realizes how UNBELIEVABLY late he is now. “Shit, I am SO late!”

Josh looks at the clock instinctively, as an afterthought.  **Oh, sorry. I’ll let you go.**

Tyler seriously considers skipping practice, he could just pretend he’s sick. There’s something about the drummer that is magnetic and he doesn’t want to leave just yet. But then Coach will call his parents, and he could hardly be taken ill if he came for his piano lesson an hour earlier.

“Listen, Josh. I wanna talk some more. Are you gonna be here tomorrow? Can we exchange numbers? Do you go to Worthington now, too?”   
“Can you sound more desperate?” Tyler’s brain screams.

Josh is beaming. Something about this boy is charming, innocent. He feels comfortable around him. That doesn’t happen very often. Most people think he’s either dumb or some freak just because he can’t hear.

Seriously fast tapping ensues **:  Yes. Yes. No. Ohio School for the Deaf. But I live right near here, that’s why I’m at this music school. Here, give me your phone, I’ll put in my number.**

Tyler hands it over rather too enthusiastically. He memorizes Josh’s contact shortly after and gives him a ring. “There, that’s my number, Josh. I’m so, so sorry, but I really have to go, I’m like so dead already. But I’ll text you after practice, okay?”

Josh high fives Tyler, who almost trips trying to maintain eye contact with him as he leaves. Josh chuckles. He honestly thinks this is the single most adorable boy he’s met in his life.

Tyler stands at the door just a second longer before bolting for the school. It’s difficult for him to digest all this. _What the hell just happened?_

-

Josh picks up his sticks again, turning off his hearing aids. There’s always too much background noise with them in, plus he can barely hear anything at all, anyway. Sometimes he considers just not using them anymore.

He’s trying to pick up where he left off, but now he’s distracted. When he closes his eyes to play, he sees Tyler’s adorable face. That little cute nose and crooked smile, those red, kissable lips. His golden skin. Oh god. His smell is still lingering in the room, too. It’s sweet, tropical.

Josh inhales. “It’s pineapple,” says his inner voice. Tyler smells like pineapple. “Well, fuck me,” Josh says to himself. He doesn’t do it constantly, but he does actually swear quite a bit. Granted, it’s mostly in his head, but still. It’s his form of rebellion, along with the arm tattoo and gauges. Life hasn’t exactly been kind to him, so he sort of feels entitled to a bit of nonconformity.

“Concentrate,” he tells himself. He picks up the sticks once more, hits the snares, and… it’s useless. He snorts, resting them on the bass drum. Josh decides to text Tyler. He just can’t get him off his mind.

**Hi Tyler, it’s Josh. Know u r at practice. Just wanted to tell u that I’ll be here at 4 tom. I’m giving a lesson. Forget 2 tell u I teach. But maybe we can chat some 2nite? Ttyl -J**

After he sends it, Josh decides to pack up and leave. He’s not going to get any more practicing done today.

Meanwhile, Tyler gets reprimanded for being late, but he honestly doesn’t care. It was worth it. The singer is about as preoccupied as the drummer is. He goes through the motions of playing, he even takes a ball to the face. The entire session is spent struggling with the image of Josh’s smile burned into his brain. His teammate Dallon calls him out on it later as they make their way to the locker room.  
“Dude, what’s up today? You’re really off.”

Tyler just shrugs. “Not feelin’ like myself. I’ll be ok.” _I’ll be okay if I get to see Josh again._

“Everything okay at home? Is it school?” Dallon’s eyebrows knit in worry. He’s a bit older than Tyler and treats him like a younger brother. Even though he’s secretly in love with him.

“Yeah, Dal. I’m just preoccupied with something. It’s fine.”

Dallon smiles. “Uh-huh. Something…or someone?”   _Please let it be me. But I know it’s not. I've never given you a reason to love me. Fuck._  
The singer’s cheeks are in flames.

“Joseph, you’re blushing. Just so you know.” Dallon clucks.   
Tyler shakes his head. “I’ve gotta go, Dal. See you tomorrow.”

Dallon nods. “Yeah, it ain’t you buddy. Go home and jerk off” he tells himself, resigned. His friend lets it go, for now. But he’s known him long enough to recognize when Tyler is smitten. He’s determined to find out what is going on.

As soon as Tyler’s out of the shower and dressed, he checks his phone. His heart leaps a bit. There’s a text from Josh! That must mean he’s thought about him!

Tyler taps in a reply. “Hi Josh. Cool. I’ll be there round 4 tom., 2. Text u when I get home, k? Talk soon bye”

-

Josh reads the reply as he throws his stuff onto the floor of his room. Both boys blush though the other won’t ever know it.

Josh’s Mom flicks the lights on in his room, as his back is turned and he can’t hear her come in. He turns and waves warmly. 

“Hey sweety. You look happy. What happened?”

Josh finally uses his voice. He has only ever used his voice with his family since he lost his hearing at age 11.

“Mom, I think I met a nice boy. Finally.”

His Mom reaches out lovingly, embracing him. He falls into her arms and squeezes hard.

She pulls away, making sure he can read her lips.  
“Joshie, I am SO happy for you. You deserve this.” She ceases speaking and just begins to sign.  
“We love you so much, we want you to be happy, sweetheart. How happy am I to see you smile, Joshie. I knew moving to this side of town would be good for you. I love you so much, sweety.”

Josh signs back. “Love you too.”            

“So, what’s this boy’s name?”

“Tyler.”  
Momma Dun is just all smiles. “Tyler is a lovely name, sweetheart. If this works out, you know we can’t wait to meet him. Where does he go to school?”

  
“Worthington.”

Her face grows grey. “The Christian school? Joshie, are you sure he…you know, likes boys? I don’t want you getting your heart broken...again.”

Without intending to, his Mom has planted a seed of doubt in his mind. “Dunno, Mom. I guess I’m going to have to ask him.”  
She grasps his biceps and kisses his forehead. “Just protect yourself, Josh. We want you to be happy and carefree.”

The drummer nods and hugs her once more. “Thanks, Mom.”

-

A few hours later, Josh is lying on his bed doing homework. He’s tummy down on the mattress and his feet swing in the air. He’s throwing side glances to the telephone, praying Tyler texts. He almost jumps out of his skin when his phone vibrates. 

It’s Tyler! As soon as he realizes, his heartbeat increases just a little. They begin texting back and forth.

T: Hi Josh, sup? what r u doing?

J: Homework, ugh. u?

T: same. Hey wanna ask u if u like video games?

J:  Yup. Most of em. Wanna play sometime?

Tyler is grinning. He’s sitting at his desk, his long legs crossed underneath him. “Josh is so nice,” he says to himself.

T: def. How long have u been playing drums?

J: Since I was 7. Kinda a long time. I’m 18 now.

So they are the same age, more or less. Tyler types back: Oh, wow. Cool. I turn 18 in a few weeks, too.

J: awesome! What position u play on the bball team?

T: Pt guard.

J: u any good? 

T: Lol, kinda. 

Well, today he kinda sucked. But there was a reason for that.

Josh is chuckling to himself. 

J: Tyler, I’ll come to your next game and be the judge 

T: I’d like that. Hey u wanna jam tom.? got an idea for a song.

J: Yeah dude. That’d be awesome!

T: ok! Cool. Well, i kinda gotta go, i’m real sorry. There’s a shit ton of homework I gotta do and I still gotta make 500 shots before dinner.

J: ???

T: My mom makes me shoot baskets before dinner.

J: Oh got it. k, so talk later, maybe? And c u tom.!

T: yup. Ttyl

Tyler replaces his phone on the desk, and stares at an open calculus book. “What the hell is all this?” He grumbles, barely comprehensible symbols and numbers inebriating him. “I can’t,” he sighs, shutting the book with a smack. All he can see is Josh’s face in every equation.

He twirls the pencil in his fingers, completely lost in thought about the boy he met just hours earlier. Inspiration strikes, and he starts writing lyrics in the open notebook before him.

A few blocks away, Josh rolls over on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. His arm rests on his warm forehead, fingers toying nervously with his curls. His world may be silent, but his heart is playing a symphony in his chest for a scrawny brunette boy that is slowly upsetting everything he ever knew, but in the best way possible. 


	2. So much for sad love songs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two boys meet up the next day.  
> Simple, no?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's so much yet to experience.

The day is neverending. Tyler sits in class and the hours just don’t pass. He’s itching in his dumb uniform and he pretends to care about the subjects of the day, but in reality he can’t wait for it to be 3:30 so he can leave and meet Josh at the music school. He thought about Josh all night. He even dreamt about him. Nothing can explain why this boy has gotten under his skin so quickly.

The drummer is already in the practice room when Tyler presents himself at the door. Josh was teaching a 9-year-old boy how to perceive the different vibrations of the various parts of the kit. They sign to one another.  When Tyler arrives, he catches the very end of the lesson. He watches Josh as he explains his passion with mesmerizing hand gestures. The little boy is just enthralled, he can tell by the wonder and delight in his eyes. _This boy is something else._  
Before leaving, the student gives Josh a big hug, and Tyler just about dies. A voice startles him.

“Isn’t he amazing? Sean just loves Josh. It’s given him hope. Losing his hearing was so tough on him, but Josh just gives him hope.”   
Tyler looks to where the voice is coming from. A lady stands in the hallway, clutching a bag to her chest. She must be the boy’s mother.

“I’m just getting to know Josh. But I think he’s an amazing person,” he replies.

The woman nods, almost tearful. “He is. Sean was so withdrawn, but since Josh starting teaching him, it’s like he’s another person. Josh is so special.” She touches Tyler’s arm gently as she passes the threshold. She flicks the light on and off to signal her presence. Both boys turn. Sean smiles and runs into the arms of his mother. “Thank you, Josh.” She signs. “Same time next week?”

Josh stands and nods. “Yes. Bye Sean. Remember to practice!”

Tyler smiles at them as they walk away.

Josh grins. He comes up to Tyler and gives him an unexpected hug. “Hi Josh” Tyler says, but then remembers he can’t see his mouth. When they pull away he repeats the greeting.

“Hey Josh. How ya doin’?”

Josh types. **Awesome, you? Im really glad you came.**

Tyler bites his lip shyly, and Josh can’t help but notice how sexy it is.

“Me too.” _I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we met._ He clears his throat.

**Did u get in trouble yesterday?**

Ty chuckles. “No, not too bad. Actually, I wrote a song last night. Wanna try to put a beat to it? I’ll sing it for you.”

Josh frowns.

“Oh shit,” Tyler realizes his gaffe.  “Oh my god, Josh. I’m so sorry. That’s dumb of me. I’m sorry I keep forgetting.”

Josh raises his hand in a wave. **It’s okay, Tyler. It means you forget I’m deaf and see me as normal. It’s awesome.**

Tyler reaches for Josh’s forearm. He allows his fingers to linger there a moment.

“You are normal, Josh. You are absolutely normal, but also extremely special. At least to me.”

He says it before he realizes it, and now he can’t take it back. The existing silence in the room deepens. Josh and Tyler stare at one another, trying to ignore that their faces are flushed. Josh finally moves to type.

**Thank you, Tyler. It means so much. Um…do you mind if I ask you something personal? I know we just met but…**

Tyler swallows. He isn’t sure what Josh would like to ask, but of course he’s curious. He kind of hopes it’s something he’s also been thinking about.

“Sure, Josh. Sure.”

Fingers tap in letters. Josh shows the screen with a little hesitance. _Okay. If I get burned, I get burned. At least I know._

**I was wondering…if by chance…Tyler… do u like boys? Cuz I like boys. I’m asking because if you don’t, I won’t embarrass myself by asking you out.**

Tyler pretty much feels like he’s having a heart attack. He can feel himself perspiring ( _Why do I sweat so much?!)_ and his breath is short. This sweet, gorgeous guy wants to ask him out?! _Oh god._

Josh is sucking on his lower lip in anticipation. “It’s okay if he says no. It’s okay if he says no…” he keeps repeating to himself.

Tyler shakes out of his trance and realizes he hasn’t answered. He’s actually never said the words aloud to anyone before. He’s known all along he likes boys, but going to a Christian school and all…and his family...

“I do like boys, Josh. And...I really like you. I wanna get to know you. I would love to go out with you.”

He said it. It’s out there. Now it’s true, forever and forever.

Josh can’t believe it, he’s ecstatic. **That’s so awesome, Tyler. I don’t know what it is. I just feel really comfortable around you. I honestly couldn’t wait to see you again today.**

Tyler can’t stifle the burning in his cheeks. In reality, the burning that is spreading _everywhere._

“Me too, Josh. Me too. I don’t know what’s happening, but whatever this is, I like it. I’m happy.”

Josh smiles, that Josh Dun “Cheshire cat” grin once more on display, landing the last blow to Tyler’s heart. The singer kind of feels faint. So much so that he can’t believe it when he hears it.

“Great, then it’s a date.”  

Tyler opens his mouth in disbelief. Without even batting an eyelash, Josh Dun has used his voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter....the date!


	3. The Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Josh and Tyler finally go on their date!

The next day is a Saturday. Finally some free time away from school and homework. It’s Josh and Tyler’s first date, and both are getting ready.

Tyler had trouble sleeping, he was so excited about his date with Josh. He tossed and turned all night, waking occasionally from fitful dreams. By the morning his clothes were stuck to him in cold sweat.   
“Why am I so nervous?!” he ponders.  
No one in his family knows he’s gay, so they are none the wiser about this outing. That also means he has no one with whom to discuss his concerns.  
Tyler picks up the phone to call Dallon, but as he stares at the name, he can’t bring himself to press the button. Shoot.  
  
He thinks his brother Zack might suspect, (it’s just been little off-hand comments he’s made to him), but Tyler is not ready to officially come out. Especially not to his younger brother. And then there’s the problem of his parents.  
He’s so close to graduating and going to college, getting out of Ohio for good. It will be easier once he’s independent.

Tyler stands in front of the mirror, dabbing his fingertip under his eyes. “Shoot, I look so tired.” The half moons are darker than usual.

“MADISON, COME IN HERE!” he pleads.

Moments later, his sister peeks over the doorframe, doing up her long, blond hair in a ponytail.  
“What, Ty?” she snaps her gum.  
Tyler lets his hands fall to his sides. “I look awful. Look at me.” He’s wearing a red shirt, black trousers, and what his brother Zack would call “church shoes.” In reality, they are just black loafers. His skinny arms tremble.

“Ty, you look amazing. It’s just your anxiety getting the better of you.” She embraces him warmly. “The only thing I’d change is the shoes. Put on your Converse. You don’t want to look too fancy.”  
She feels her brother nod in agreement against her head. “Okay, Mad. Thanks.”  
As Madison pulls away she smiles. “Tyler…since when do you care what you look like? You got a date with someone special, huh?”

“Shut up.” Tyler blushes. “Maybe I do. Shoot. Do you have any eye cream?”   
Madison crosses her arms. “Dude, Mom won’t even let me wear lip gloss. I’m 12. Why don’t you go look in her room? I’m sure she’s got some.”

He’s still eyeing himself in the mirror. “Hmhm. Yeah, okay. I’ll wait until she goes grocery shopping.”  
  
“So…” Maddie clucks her tongue. “Who’s the girl? Is it that Sarah from bible study? She’s been staring at you a lot.”  
If she has, Tyler hasn’t noticed.    
“No, the…person doesn’t go to church or Worthington. I met them at the music school.” If only he could be honest with her.  
“Oh….,” Now she’s intrigued. Tyler’s sister sits down on the edge of his bed with a plop and swings her feet. “So, what’s her name? What instrument does she play? How old is she? Are you going to ask her to prom?”  
  
Tyler sighs. Why couldn’t he have had another brother instead of this Curious Cathy? Could he trust Madison with this secret? Would she understand?  
“Um, not that it’s any of your business, Maddie, but I know you won’t leave me alone until I tell you.”  
Tyler is totally buying time. No, he can’t risk it.  
“She’s 18. She plays…flute.”  _Yeah, that’s something girly if we are going to stereotype. Nice, Ty._    
“And her name is Josh.“    
Shit!

Maddie rolls her neck. Same as her brother does when he’s nervous. “Her name is Josh?” Her squint is of pure disbelief.   
Tyler’s mouth is dry as paper. “You didn’t let me finish. Her name’s Josh-lynn.”  
“That’s a weird name.”  
Maddie’s looking up at him with wide, light eyes. “Is she pretty?”  
Oh, Jesus. The singer smiles to himself. “Beautiful. One of a kind. Dark, curly hair and the most gorgeous gaze I have ever seen. Enchanting.”   
His sister bites her nails and squeals.  “Ohhhhh Tylerrrrr you are SO in love!”  
Tyler can’t help the grin on his face. “Yeah, I think I might be.”   
  
Tyler’s brother Zack has the most perfect timing to ruin things. “What’s up, losers?” He barges into the room and kicks Tyler's backpack.  
Madison and Tyler can’t eye roll fast enough. “Nothing. Just talking.”

“’Bout what? Why’re you dressed up, Ty? Got a date or something? Going to church with Mom?”   
Tyler pleads with his eyes, and his sister picks up the clue.   
“Zack, why don’t you mind your own business? Tyler and I were talking privately.”

Zack guffaws. “Is it about how he’s gay for that kid Dallon?”

Tyler has had enough. “All right, everybody out of my room.”

-

Things go quite differently at the Dun house. Momma Dun is attentive and helpful, as usual. And Abigail is beside herself with glee.   
“Joshie, I am so happy for you,” she signs. “You look STUNNING. Doesn’t he look good, Jordie?”   
Josh’s brother nods and offers him a tight hug. “I hope this boy deserves your attention, Josh. Otherwise, I’m beating him up. I may be small, but I can throw a punch!”

Josh giggles. “Thanks, Jordie. Tyler is very nice, I’m sure he’ll be a perfect gentleman.”  
Laura fixes his collar and kisses him on the cheek. “He better be. Only the best for my Joshie.”

“Mom, stop.” Josh’s cheeks glow pink.

“Okay kids, you’ve got soccer and dance. And Joshie has a lunch date. Everybody in the car.”   
Josh tugs on his mother’s sleeve. “Mom, I’d rather walk. I need to calm my nerves a second. The place where we’re meeting is close by.”

Laura understands. She was young once, too. “It’s fine, Joshie. Take your time. You’ve got your phone on you, yes?”  
Josh displays it for her. “I’ll be fine, Mom. It’s a picnic in the park.”   
“Okay, okay. I’ll see you later, then. Have fun, Joshie.”   
“HAVE FUN JOSHIE!!” scream Abby and Jordan from the living room.

_

  
Josh and Tyler arrive at almost the same time at the secluded park near Josh’s home.  
Tyler drove over so he could listen to music in peace.  
Josh is carrying a basket, and he sets it down next to him when he reaches the bench he has chosen. It’s further off from the others, so they can talk in peace in case other people arrive. For the moment the park is empty.   
   
He can see Tyler parking the car, and his breath catches for a moment. He’s…gorgeous. Josh smiles to himself. Tyler dressed up. _For him._  
“He looks fantastic in red,” Josh can’t tear his eyes away.  
  
Tyler runs over to him, his backpack swaying behind him. He throws it to the ground and wraps his arms around Josh with an enthusiasm akin to people who haven’t seen each other in years.  
Both suspire.  
This is the first time they have touched bodies. Tyler dares a squeeze, and Josh gives in to it.  
Tyler is so tiny, Josh notices. He’s thin and wiry, the drummer can feel his shoulder blades poking under his forearms. It’s confirmed as he inhales. Tyler smells like pineapples.  
The singer, instead, melts into the protective, muscular arms holding him. “I could stay here forever,” he muses.

When they finally pull away, Tyler signs “Hi Josh, how are you?”  
Josh puts a hand to his heart. _He’s learning to sign!_  
“I’m great.”  
Tyler swallows down emotion. Josh’s voice is deep, almost a lullaby. He can’t believe he’s chosen to use his voice with him.  
“I’m good, too. What a great idea, Josh. A picnic is perfect.”  
The older is beaming. He lifts the basket proudly.  
“My Mom made us a whole bunch of stuff. She’s used to cooking for an army so it’s probably also _too_ much.”  
They both giggle.  
Tyler sits down opposite Josh so he can lip-read easier. “Yeah, I took stuff from the fridge, too. Just in case.”  
The boys pull food out of the basket and Josh plates.  
“Mom made a taco salad. I hope you like Mexican. If not there are sandwiches in there, too, and a container of pasta.”  
Tyler grins. “Dude, I love Mexican!”  
“Awesome! Me, too!”

Once everything is set up, they sit down to eat. Tyler notices that he’s staring at Josh. He is the cutest eater he’s ever seen. He chews so quietly and his nose scrunches when he swallows.  
“This is amazing, Josh. Your Mom is such a good cook.”  
Josh’s mouth is full and he gives a thumbs up.  
“So, Josh. Do you have any brothers or sisters?”  
Josh wipes his mouth. “Yeah. Ashley, Jordan, and Abigail. Younger, in that order. Abby’s the youngest, 10. She’s really sweet.”  
“Cool, me too. I’ve got two brothers, though and one sister. Zack, Madison, and Jay. Madison is 12. I get along with her, too. Zack is a pain in the ass, he’s 16 and thinks he’s so cool.”

“Yeah, brothers can be annoying,” Josh agrees. “Jordie is still young but he follows me around everywhere. I’m surprised he didn’t pop out of the picnic basket.”  
Tyler laughs so hard he nearly spits his soda.  
“Hey Ty. What do you like better, basketball or music?”  
Tyler’s forehead furrows. “I always thought I wanted to be a pro basketball player. But I don’t know anymore. I think I wanna go into music. It makes me feel...free. Because a lot of times I don't, I'm not." Tyler's eyes stop sparkling.  
"But that’s going to be a hard sell to my parents. They're so involved in my life, they really wanted me to have this. But I just don’t see it being ME, you know? It'll kill them. That, and my coming out. We're gonna have a hard conversation soon.”

Josh is pensive. “No, I get it. I do. All I want to do is play drums. Being deaf is not a limitation, don’t get me wrong. But I can’t exactly sit at a desk and answer phones and stuff. This is what I wanna do. Teach drums. Especially to deaf children. And maybe play professionally one day.”

“You’re amazing, Josh. Honestly. You stopped me in my tracks the other day.”  
Josh’s pale complexion tinges red. “Thank you, Ty.”  
“Josh, can I ask you something personal?”  
Josh nods as he pulls out a bag of chips.  
Tyler gulps.  
“Josh, how did it happen?” He points to his ears.  
Josh isn’t uncomfortable talking about it, and Tyler has a right to know.  
  
“I was 11. I got a terrible infection. Got taken to the hospital and was there like a week. Unfortunately they weren’t able to save my hearing. I’m almost completely deaf, like 98%. That’s why I can still speak, though out in public I don’t like to. Only with special people.”  
Tyler is studying his plate, blushing terribly. A shaky hand reaches out and caresses Josh’s.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you. Especially being a musician. You are something else, Josh. You’ve overcome so much.”

Josh shakes his head. “I’m no more special than anyone else, Ty.” He looks down at the rubber band on Tyler’s wrist.  
“Now it’s my turn. What’s with that?” He motions to it.  
  
Tyler goes quiet for a moment. The drummer can tell it's not something Ty talks about. He clutches his hand harder.   
  
“I have awful anxiety. I am kinda a perfectionist, sometimes it’s all too much. I get…overwhelmed. The pressure. Sometimes I get sad, too. Really bad. I keep it there so when I want to hurt myself, I snap it. It brings me back to reality. I don’t know if that makes sense, but it works.”  
  
Josh places his other hand on top of Tyler’s. “No, it totally does. Oh Tyler, it kills me to think you get so sad sometimes. I only want to see you smiling. Since it’s such a stunning smile.”  
Josh and Tyler look into each other’s eyes, seeing one another like they never have before. His chest feels tight and Tyler is on the verge of tears.

The older breaks the silence. “I want you to sing for me, Tyler. Please.”

Ty’s mouth hangs open. “But- you can’t-“  
“There’s a way. I’ll explain. Is there somewhere private we can go?”  
Ty looks around. His car!  
“We can go to my car, Josh. There’s nobody in the parking lot right now.”  
  
“Okay. Perfect. Let’s leave everything here for now. Don’t think there are bears around. Ha! Jokes aside, I need to feel you sing.”  
_Feel.  
_ Josh and Tyler walk over to the car in silence, holding hands. Tyler’s is cool to the touch while Josh is always running warm.

When they get in, Tyler takes the driver’s seat and Josh the passenger’s. Josh turns his torso to face the singer and pushes up to the very middle.  
  
Tyler is fighting the impulse to kiss Josh right here and now. His heart is wringing in his ribcage. “Jesus I am gone for you.”  
Josh is unsuccessfully trying to distract himself from Tyler’s ruby lips.  
  
“I have 2 percent hearing. So if you sing, and I put my ear to your cheek, I might be able to hear something. At the same time, I’m going to keep my hand on your chest so I can perceive the vibrations. Does that make you uncomfortable, Ty? Do you mind doing this for me?”  
“I’d do anything for you,” Tyler keeps to himself.  
  
“Josh, of course. I was so disappointed I couldn’t sing for you the other day. If this can work, heck, anytime.”  
Josh leans in, halting when he passes the singer’s mouth. He rests his cheek against Tyler’s.  
  
One hand reaches around to the center of his back, the other flat in the middle of Tyler’s chest.  
The drummer notices that Tyler’s heart is racing. Almost as much as his own.  
  
Josh closes his eyes and inhales. “I’m ready, Ty.”  
Tyler’s about to faint. Josh’s skin is emanating heat through the fabric. Oh god. His cheek, he smells like something spicy and Tyler just isn’t connecting anymore.  
"Ty?"  
Oh yeah, the song.  
  
He’s so emotional his voice breaks, but he gets through it. Josh’s even breathing against his breast helps to soothe him.  
When he’s finished, Josh pulls back, enough to be a hair’s breadth from Tyler’s face. A tear slowly rolls down the groove of his nose and he licks it when it reaches his mouth.  
  
The singer’s in shock.  
“That was breathtaking,” Josh whispers. “Oh god, just…thank you.”  
Tyler nods. He is so choked up he can’t find his voice.  
  
“Tyler…” Josh murmurs.  
_Oh god…is it happening?_  
“Yes Josh?”  
  
Josh licks his full lips. The pounding under his hand speeds up and Tyler’s pupils widen.  
“Tyler, I think I’m in love with you.”  
The younger bites into his lower lip. _Oh my god!_  
“Josh, I’m in love with you, too. So so gone.”  
The drummer smiles, doesn’t move an inch save for his head. He lifts it up to angle in, eyes darting from Tyler’s gaze to his slick, crimson mouth. Tyler’s chestnut eyes are imploring.   
  
Josh leans in and covers Ty’s with his tenderness. The kiss is soft, pure, and warm.   
  
The singer grows bolder, requesting permission to penetrate Josh’s space by testing the gap of his lips. Their tongues lightly brush, velvety and smooth.

The pounding has become a series of rapid thumps as they open further, muscles more insistent.  
Josh breathes through his nose, craving more, and soon sucks on Ty’s lower lip.  
Tyler's fingers are the other half of this whole now kneading into Josh’s strong back.  
  
Tyler moans. Josh doesn’t hear it, but he can feel it shake in the younger's chest. He groans back.  
  
The world is forgotten for a moment. A storm in a silent cocoon, they live this fully as it slowly consumes the emptiness in their souls. It's the hollow they didn’t even realize could be filled by love.   
Their bodies slowly formulate the answer to the question: Is it you and me forever?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh...so emo right now. I love these bois!

**Author's Note:**

> How much do I love Momma Dun here?  
> These boys will be the end of me.  
> UGH
> 
> Thanks to Halsey for the inspiration. "Is there somewhere"


End file.
